...and breathe
I think it's safe to say that I am buckling under, just a little bit. The stress load is taking its toll on me. So is the lack of sleep.
I've only been sleeping about 4.5 to 5 hours every night. That's less than usual, and I'm starting to see dark circles under my eyes. I'm grouchy. No, I'm depressed. That's worse than grouchy. That is a state that includes grouchy, along with some other unattractive attributes.
I'm in the kind of mood to push away everything in my life that has ever made me happy. (Yes, friends, too.) Then, I get even more down because I have no one in my life. It's goes 'round and 'round.
I can feel the anxiety rattling in my chest. I'm nervous and sad. Those aren't normal emotive responses to proximal stimuli. That's a response to some sort of persistent absent stimulus. That's stress. If I can keep that in mind, I should be able to beat it.
Maybe I'll eat something.
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